Friday, December 31, 2010
About two weeks before my Momma passed she had my daddy buy her a wedding dress from a local boutique. See she wanted to re-marry him on their 25th wedding anniversary (this year was their 21st) The dress was way too small for her but she put it on anyways. Later she had me put on the dress (I could not fit it either) but she told me "You are going to make a beautiful Bride."
Memories do not have to be necessarily full of happiness to be treasured so close to the heart. I have many memories of this year that I fill my heart with sadness and a tinge of joy around the edges. Through all of this year I have learned many important lessons of growing up and taking responsibility. I have been at times "floating on top of the clouds" and at other times "buried in grief. "
I could not have made it if it was not for Jesus. My steady Rock that has held me firmly. Through all my wrongs and dissapointments. To the joyful, amazing moments. I do not want to miss out on the rest of my journey.
I do not know what 2011 will bring. I can firmly say that Jesus does :)
Happy New Year,
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
I have to say that it really struck a chord in my heart. Yes, waiting on what step to take in life next is hard. Yes, waiting for God to give me a husband is hard. Yes, living without my precious mother is hard. But I have to remember God has a plan in all this. I will recieve the promises He has promised. I can not give up so easily.. God's treasure is just in reach. I will trust Him. Because even though on my toughest of days.. I am a jewel in His crown. I will trust Him because He is worthy... He hasn't forgotten you dear Lady of God. He loves you and understands when nobody does. He knows the depth of your heart and the thoughts that you think. And yet He still chases you with reckless Love. Oh me, wow.. when I think about it.. It makes my heart want to burst with all sorts of emotions! Oh how He loves us...
Monday, October 25, 2010
Anyways so now that I have got that off my chest... I hope you will enjoy my blog change that will be coming up :)
My Purpose- "that with purpose of heart they would cleave unto the Lord" ~Acts 11:23
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
I don't think I have posted it yet but I have enrolled in online classes for photography. I am excited and I am hoping to soon finish and be able to start my own little business.
God has been simply amazing this past month and a half. I have bad days where I miss my momma so bad. She was truly my best friend. But I know God had a reason and purpose. That always helps me to take a big breath and to know that I don't see the big picture :)
I hope to be blogging more now and to be able to read all the blogs I have suscribed to..But anyways thank you everybody for the comments and prayers :)
Blessings and Love,
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Heya :) So I am on my way home from
vacation. I had a blast! Made so many memories and even got to meet Elvis!! (an impersonator of course) LOL You would have thought he was the real thing.. Because we went a second time to see him :) LOL But overall it was a blast to go shopping and just having a crazy, good time :)
Speaking of shopping I went into a book store that had really really cheap books. I got "Authentic Beauty" by Leslie Ludy for $5.99 and "Saving My First Kiss" for only $2! I just finished "Saving My First Kiss" Let me tell you I was estatic to find a book titled that! An interesting concept the author talked about ( Lisa Velthouse who at the time the book was a 20yr old who had never been kissed) was think of your life like a huge painting. Up there in a corner is a white space and you keep pointing to the Artist "Hey look at that white space, please paint it" (my words) When all along He is already painting something beautiful in your life... You got to step and look back at the whole picture instead of sticking your nose right on that white space. Another thing I liked about this book is she talks about the big question "How far can I go" She introduces a new question "How much can I save" Wouldn't it be great to one day give your husband/wife your
first kiss or like one of my best friends your first hug. Like I told some people the other night there is nothing wrong with being pure.. God actually celebrates purity.. Not just physical purity but a heart that is pure toward Him. It's actually great if you save your kisses and hugs. Think of it this was would rather have a heart full of past regrets or a heart full of rewards with waiting. Waiting is hard I know but all good things came to them that wait :) So the question is how much can you save?
Blessings and Love,
Friday, August 27, 2010
So.. for my big news.. I am not going to Mount Zion. I prayed and agonized over that decision for nearly two weeks. I finally felt led to talk to my Aunt Shirley, who had been like a mother to my mom. I talked to her about how I was so torn. I wanted to stay here but I guess I felt obligated to go to MZ. A peace flooded my heart as I talked about staying. It was God's will for me to stay. So now I am living with my Co-Pastor and his wife. I am going to be helping them in the ministry. I have slowly come to realize why God wants me to stay. There is so much I could and will do right here. Anyways I was just catching up to everyone! Peace out :)
Blessings and Love,
Thursday, August 5, 2010
"Don't, don't, don't, don't let the devil ride.
Dont, don't, don't, don't let the devil ride.
If you let him ride, he'll wanna drive,
don't let the devil ride."
"Don't, don't, don't, don't let him talk to you.
Don't, don't, don't, don't let him talk to you.
You let him talk to you, he'll make you sad and blue,
don't let him talk to you."
It's a really upbeat song. People probaly thought I was on nerve medicine but I was on Jesus. God was my strength! Another thing people probaly thought me and my church was crazy. See we have been in a youth revival in a tent in the boonies (southern word :) People have been getting saved and filled with the HolyGhost. We didn't stop having church the day she went home with Jesus, nor her wake, neither the day of her going away party. We (even me) went onto church... and people came those nights and got deliverance. You could feel momma's Spirit there with us at the tent. I told some of our young people before we left for church...that was just my momma's body there, but her Spirit was at that tent meeting. I wanted to be where my momma was at. I know people thought I was off my rocker. It's something I can't explain. God has just had me hid in His arms.
I can't tell you how much my church family has meant to me during this time. It's amazing... You find out who your true family is. :):) I love them people to death...
Just pray for me right now and my little brother. He took it hard, he's not even ten, so theres things he doesn't understand. I mean I don't understand why it was God's will for my momma to go on to be with the Lord. But let me tell you something my momma did not quit having faith. The night before she went home, I told her something along the lines, We are going to make it through this, we are going to keep fighting, and I will never forget her words "Of course." Somebody said something on my FaceBook about how her faith ended in sight. I have no doubt she's done met all them Bible people. I can just see her talking to Esther.. "Me and my daughter loved that movie 'One Night With the King', is that how it really happened?" My uncle asked her just last week "Who's your favorite person in the Bible?" and she said "Jesus." Last Wedensday we had nearly lost her and all our family had gathered at the house. My uncle I think went and hugged her and said something about her dying..and she said something along the lines "Ya'll have all came to see me die, I'm not dying." She fought on longer than the hospice nurse thought. Let me tell you something I don't care for them kind of people, well their profession, put it that way... Man, but I love me some Jesus FAITH people :) Wow so I have wrote a lot. Just wanted to say how wonderful my momma is.. To me she isn't dead, but alive in Heaven and in my heart. The Lord brought a scripture to my heart, where the angels were at the tomb, and they said "Why do you search for the living among the dead?" I think that is how it went.....
Welp, this is just a little tribute to my momma :) Who's dancing on the diamonds flung across the sky :)
Blessings and Love,
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Blessings and Love,
Saturday, July 17, 2010
man that trusts in the Lord as a tree. In the dawn of your night you may see rotten branches and bad fruit that was shaken off in the storm. Imma hopin you can see whata Imma a sayin.... Trials. Tests. Storms. Are all to show a mirror into our hearts and if we allow the Holy Ghost will shine us real good to get that little spot or big spot off our mirror. My Co-Pastor says something along these lines "There is a trial custom made just for you." A tree may bend all the way to the left and all the way to the right. Sooner or later it will stand straight back up if is planted by the Lord. So tree of the Lord be strong and vigilant.
"I the Lord doth keep it; I will water it every moment; lest any hurt it, I will keep it night and day." -Isaiah 27:3
P.S. I LOVE everybody's comments, I may not comment back but I do read them and appreciate your words of encouragement. Some of you are very special to my heart, because you are my sisters in Christ <3
Blessings and Love,
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
So as some of you know my mom has been battling colon cancer and bronchitus. I know she is healed but we are just coming through a valley. It's amazing how trials are. It's like all during this time God has been holding up a mirror to my heart and I see what I really am deep inside. Just like the Bible talks about being purified we have to go through the fire. Before this trial started I thought I really trusted in God and had Faith in Him. Maybe I did to a certain point. But now it's deeper and it's like when fear and doubt starts creeping in I'm like "God I trust you, your gonna have to help me." It's amazing how God works. People around me are talking doubt and not faith. Even people close to my heart. The other day I was sad about what people were telling me. God though impressed upon my heart "It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man." I love how the Lord reminds you of His words at the tight time. Flesh wants to be in control
and have everything it's way. So when it comes to the point where you can't control the situation, it's scary just to say "God I trust you." Oh but the peace that follows. I am holding on for my momma's healing. God has been giving me verses and a thought hit me the other day. God's word is going to stand forever no matter what. I will trust in His word, I will put my confidence in Him. What is impossible with man, is possible with God. Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen.
Blessings and Love,
(Only 47 more days till college :):):)
Monday, July 12, 2010
A Letter From God to Women
"When I created the heavens and the earth. I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils, but you, WOMAN, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man, because your nostrils are too delicate, I allowed a deep sleep to come over him. So I could patiently and perfectly fashion you.
Man was put to sleep so that he could not interere with creativity. From one bone, I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib.
Which protects his heart and lungs that support him, as you are meant to do. Around this one bone, I shaped you... I molded you. I created you perfectly and beautifully.
Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Woman support the man as the rib supports the body.
You were not taken from his feet, to be under him. Nor were you taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand by him and be held close to his side.
You are my perfect angel... You are my beautiful little girl. You have grown to a splendid woman of excellence, and my eyes when I see the virtues in your heart.
Your eyes...don't change them. Your lips....how lovely when they part in prayer. Your nose, so perfect in form. Your hands so gently to touch. I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep. I've held your heart close to mine. Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like me.
Adam walked in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely. He could not see me or touch me. He could only feel me. So everything I wanted Adam to share and expierence with me. I fashioned you; my holiness, my strength, my purity, my love, my protection and support. You are special because you are an extension of me.
Man represents my image, woman my emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.
So man....treat woman well. Love her, respect her, for she is fragile."
Note from me: kind of have to take some of what is written with a grain of salt or I should say balance. I believe a man or woman can be total and complete in God without marriage. But this is still beautiful the way it's explained. Anyways :):)
Blessings and Love,
Monday, July 5, 2010
The other day though I was reading this blog. I believe the name of it is "Love Unawakened." Well there was this really neat idea. I know how us "waiting" girls can get caught up in thinking about our future earthly prince and pray about him constantly. That he will be kept and that God will bring you and him together soon. What the blog suggested was everytime you see a caterpillar or a butterfly let that be a prayer promt for you and your future husband. Just like the caterpillar goes into it's cocoon and comes out a butterfly, so will it be for us when God finally brings your earthly prince. Well I got to thinking well I don't see many butterflys or caterpillars. But I have discovered they are everywhere just about. They don't have to be real. But I just thought I would pass along that. Because it's really sweet and amazing reminder. :):)
Blessings and Love,
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Today's service at church was Awe-Some :D It was all about having the love of Jesus come through our hearts and life! Offering mercy instead of judgement and critiscm. Jesus came to save the lost. But the church has seem to have lost that. But so thankful that Jesus is opening our eyes to the Truth :D Love, Love it
Blessings and Love
Friday, June 4, 2010
So to my topic.... On FaceBook there is constant gushy goo love "I love you so much." Between the girlfriends and boyfriends) Anyways I was like you know wishing for that in a way. I was like God can't really send me a FaceBook message. But then I started thinking about how He will paint the sky in my favorite colors.... He says I love you. When He does just the little things like a verse or just a cool wind on a hot day He says I love you. When I feel like giving up He sweetly strengthens me... He says I love you. What a wonderful Prince! I am His Bride and He is my Husband =)
Blessings and Love,
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Well God has provided money for me to go to college =D I am so excited!!!! Only 96 more days and I am ready to start the path God has laid out for me :)
Oh and guess what I was able to order a simply modest bathing suit!!!!! I am thrilled and cannot wait to get it :)
Anyways I guess I'm going go just thought I would let everyone know I'm still alive :D
Love and Bunches of Blessings,
Friday, April 30, 2010
Thursday, April 29, 2010
So this is the 4th night of Revival. A couple of nights ago my Pastor's daughter got deliverance from her sin! Oh it was so amazing. We know God is going to get rid of our church form and just let Him move!!! Last night the preacher ministrered about how we can't get any anywhere with God covering up our sin and having oughts against our brothers and sisters. The loving convicting Spirit of God came down and we went to the people who we had fought or had something against them. Forgiveness and Love just poured forth. It says if we don't forgive trespasses that our heavenly Father will not forgive us. It was so wonderful!! Now God can move and bring in sinners. Because if we aren't in unity there can't be anything to be done..
More Later :)
Blessings and Love,
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
You know as little girls we all have the dream of being swept away by that handsome Prince into the beautiful setting sun. Or that total cutie Ken Barbie doll in his 4 wheel drive Jeep. Take your pick :D Laugh Out Loud :D
My point is that we do have a King that is just dying (Which he actually did die for you) to make your fairytale dream come true.. No not with an earthly man... But Him :D It says in Psalm 45:11 "So shall the King greatly desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou Him." Wow he desires me, he desires you....
I think about how relationships between a guy and a girl or I'll see a Facebook status about their "love" about how they can't stop thinking about them... Well I've came to know a King who's thoughts about me are more than the sand (Psalm 139:18) I've came to know a King who knows my downsittig and my uprising. (Psalm 139:2) I've came to know a King who is my shield and my buckler from the them that try to harm me. (Psalm 18:30-35) I've came to know a King who gave His very life because He had so much love for me.
Why would I not want to travel into the sunset on that straight and narrow road... Into my Loving King's arms..
Blessings and Love,
Friday, April 23, 2010
redeemed by His power, and comforted by His presence; she delights to know that she is not her own, for she is bought with a price... She loves her King, and loves Him with ardor unquenchable, for many waters cannot drown His love, neither can floods quench it." ~ Charles Spurgeon
(Leslie Ludy changed the masculine pronouns to the feminine in this quote)
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
"An Orthodox priest, a friend of mine, telephoned me and told me that a Russian officer had come to him to confess. My friend did not know Russian. However knowing that I speak Russian, he had given him my address. The next day this man came to see me. He longed for God, but he had never seen a Bible. He had no religious education and never attended religious services (churches in Russia then were very scarce). He loved God without the slighest knowledge of Him.
I read to him the Sermon of the Mount and the Parables of Jesus. After hearing them, he danced around the room in rapturous joy proclaiming, "Whg a wonderful beauty! How could I live without knowing this Christ!" It was the first time that I saw someone so joyful in Christ.
Then I made a mistake. I read to him the passion and crucifixation of Christ, without having prepared him for this. He had not expected it and, when he heard how Christ was beaten, how He was crucified and that in the end He died, he fell in an armchair and began to weep bitterly. He had believed in a Savior and now his Savior was dead!
I looked at him and was ashamed. I had called muself a Christian, a pastor, and a teacher of others, but I had never shared the sufferings of Christ as this Russian offficer now shared them. Looking at him, it was like seeing Mary Magdalene weeping at the foot of the cross, faithfully weeping when Jesus was a corspe in the tomb.
Then I read to him the story of resurrection and watched his expression change. He had not known that his Savior arose from the tomb. When he heard this wonderful news, he beat his knees and swore- using very dirty, but very "holy" profanity. This was his crude manner of speech. Again he rejoiced, shouting for joy, "He is alive! He is alive!" He danced around the room once more, overwhelmed with happiness!
I said to him, "Let us pray!" He did not know how to pray. He did not know our "holy" phrases. He fell on his knees together with me and his words of prayer were: "Oh God, what a fine chap you are! If I were You and You were me, I would never have forgiven You of Your sins. But You are really a very nice chap! I love you with all of my heart." "
Wow.. This humbles me and calls me... Oh my word God's people WAKE UP!!!
Friday, April 16, 2010
Mercy.. Yep we have been given it and we have heard it, and we have read about it countless times in the Bible. The other day I was listening to a certain worship song and the Lord shed a whole different stage light on it in my understanding. The song verse went something like this "Your Mercy calls me to be like You." Wow... I have always seen mercy as getting all my sins forgiven and my mistakes forgiven by God. But why does He give us mercy.. Not just to save us from that burning firey death... But to become Like Him!!!!! Whenever I make a mistake God shows His Mercy by showing that I did wrong... Not just to get my sin forgiven and go back out and do it again. But to show me I have done wrong and that He is wants to make me like Him. Like those verses that say "Whom the father loveth, He correcteth."
Mercy calls me to be like You, Thank You Jesus....
Blessings and Love,
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Surrender... Jesus has been tugging on my heart about just surrendering to His will. Just to seek Him and be so lost in working for His kingdom. After reading Sacred Singleness a second time (Excellent book by the way) I just want to do something for Him more!!! There are so many children out there, who have no home and are being sold into slavery. There needs to be hope for these precious children. Why should we single young ladies be sitting around mourning our lonliness and feel like we are going to die if we ain't got a man. I know words are so cheap these days. But my heart burns for these children. They need momma's and daddys and love. We don't have to be married to make a difference in a child's life. Be their mother and God will be their Father.
These past few days God has been gently correcting my sighing heart. What I mean about sighing is that for example today I was unloading the dishwasher and I was thinking about how I didn't have my man yet. Then the Lord brings to my attention to surrender and my heart cries something similar to "Lord I know you have a plan, and I want to be in your will." It's not easy for my flesh to say that. I know that as long as I just get myself lost in God and work for His Kingdom. Nae, my hands are not bound, nor my feet, my heart is free to be captivated by the Saviour, to walk and live in His Spirit. Yes, I still long for the day when God sees that me and my husband are ready for each other. But right now I need (not just want) to go deeper in Jesus. I just thought of something. You know how people ask that question "So has God brought that special someone into your life?" Do the whole happy sigh thing and twist a piece of your hair and say "Yes!!! His name is
Saturday, March 27, 2010
white has become black. I know thst God is judge." There is only one lawgiver who is able to save and destroy who are thou that judgest another." I need humbleness and love, not mine but Jesus Christ, the Saviour of Men.
"Lord let us be a generation that seeks, that seeks your face, Oh God of Jacob" ~We Bow Our Hearts~
Sunday, March 21, 2010
this is His will for me." Another time when we got on this subject he was debating about it and saying negative things. I told him something I had read off of another blog similar to these words "Would rather be given an apple that is rotten and half-bitten off, or would you rather have a nice, clean apple." (I am not condemning anyone, God has mercy and forgiveness, no matter what kind of mistakes that have been made. His blood washes and cleans us) I said all this to say this.. It's ok to wait and not date :) You don't have to date 10 guys to find out what you want. God knows the desires of our hearts and when we delight ourself in him his will and desires will become ours. We must sleep like Adam did. He made Eve for Him but he was asleep. We must also sit at the feet of Jesus like Mary. Martha was busied about and was complaining about how Mary was just sitting there. But Jesus told her that Mary had chosen the good part and it would not be taken
away from her. You can take that dating wise too. Be worried about finding the right one and start settling with just average. When you could sit at Jesus' feet and fall in love with Him :) For He satisfieth the Longing heart and filleth the hungry soul with goodness. I know the Lord has a beautiful God scripted love story if we just sit at his feet and wait upon him :D
Blessings & Love,
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Yesterday I got to thinking I don't even know what Christ means. So I looked it up in the dictionary. It means "any expected deliverer." Wow.. That says a lot just right there. Salvation Expected Deliverer. He came to save us from our sin! Hallelujah!! I know this may sound so elementary and that I should have known what Christ meant. But when you see what's behind his name it's like Wow! When you began to think and study about how Jesus gave his all... His very Life for us... It is simply humblingly and so... Unexplainable. How he would come down from Heaven and become a man...how he stood up for the truth and how he died. The other day I was sitting in my P.E. Class and I was thinking about his death. How he layed his life down...and he told them "no man taketh it from me" How powerful and deep these words are... What a wonderful and beautiful Saviour... Our Salvation Expected Deliverer...
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Last night I was talking to one of my guy friends on Facebook. We use to go to middle school together but after the 9th grade he moved to a different school. So we were just talking about Prom and he was saying he didn't want to take anyone from the school he goes to. I was like "Aren't you going to take your girlfriend?" (His profile pic had been of him and this girl..so I assumed that it was his girl) "No I don't have one" then came the question...."Do you have a boyfriend?" I replied "No I don't, I'm not into dating right now." "Why? You could meet guys." My Reply went something like this "Yea I could, but I don't want to, I am waiting for the one God has for me." He says "How will you know if he is the one." (my guyfriend is not a Christian) so I explained that God would give us wisdom that we would just know and that God gave me a joy that no guy could ever give me. His reply..."Well, that's odd."
I wasn't expecting that kind of reply..LOL But the Bible does say we are a peculiar people.
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
I have been meditating on Psalm 139. It has became such a reality to me. That he would care to know my uprising and my downsitting. That he knows the words in my mouth before I even speak. He is aquainted with all my ways. What a beautiful truth. That he would have mercy and save me. That he would still love me even though he knows everthing about me. What a LOVE!
No man could ever make me feel like Jesus. Even if I make my bed in hell he is there. If I take the wings of the morning and dewell in the uttermost part of the sea...even there shall his hand lead me and his right hand hold me. He has possessed my reins and covered me in my mother's womb. I am fearfully and wonderfully made.... He saw my substance...and though I was unperfect....the great sum of His thoughts toward me....If I should count them they are more in number than the sand (Every girl wants a guy who continually thinks about them and just adores them..wow Jesus thinks more of us than anything :) I would encourage you girls to check out Psalms 139 and see it as a love poem from God :D God Bless :D
Friday, February 26, 2010
Yes, I can have my Heavenly prince right now..he is always with me...But one day he is coming back. I don't know when, where, and what. But I know he is coming and I must be ready.. Suzette commented on my post yesterday about how maybe the man God has for me isn't ready. That kinda made me think. I need to be the bride that I need to be for Christ.. He is coming in all his glory and we need to be ready. Thank You Lord for Sweet Eye Openers :)
Thursday, February 25, 2010
We are all human and we long for Love and Satisfaction. I remember reading in Passion & Purity about the way "bread" could not satisfy the heart like "manna" Bread is the dating/earthly love/earlthy pleasures and Manna is that heavenly bread Jesus. (My Definitions) I wish I could remember how Elisabeth Elliot explained it.
I am not saying that it was wrong for me to be checking to see how happy and content people were. But that I was losing focus on what God wanted for me. I would be asking myself "When am I going to fall in love? Where is the One God has for me?" My heart would start to feel impatient and lonely. But God is getting my heart and affections back where they need to be "For He satisfieth the longing heart, and filled the hungry soul with goodness"
Yesterday, I was sitting in my P.E. class thinking about the future and feeling out of control. The Lord brought Jeremiah 17:5-8 to my thoughts. It talks about how the man who doesn't trust the Lord he is like in a desert and the man who trusts in the Lord is like a tree planted in the waters. It really got me to thinking and it encouraged me greatly.
I hope this post makes sense... My thoughts kinda look jumbled together..Oh well :) God Bless Ya'll
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
It's a federal offense to harm eagle eggs. You can go to jail for mistreating your animal. But a human that is pregnant can go and get her baby terminated. I just don't understand people's thinking and how they comprehend that that is ok. I know that its in the Bible that right will be called wrong and wrong be right. It just really bothers me!
Monday, January 25, 2010
come back with full force. Tonight though it was just a battling me. I know it was the Spirit of God that rose up in me and I started telling that devil to get out of here that I was covered by the Blood of Jesus and that the word of God stands forever! Jesus is carrying me through!! I began to think of how we walk around defeated and being wimpy. I know I have grown weary at times! "God when is this gonna go away, you have got to help me!! I can't do it by myself!!!" But you know what? The power in us is not our own!! It's Jesus that was slain from the foundation of the world! The God of all power and salvation! We are his holy temple!! Sure the devil is walking around seeking whom he may devour. But we as God's children we will resist steadfast in the FAITH!! To be sober and vigilant!! ( 1 Peter 4:8-9) To endure hardness as a good soldier in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 2:3)
God is our salvation! My heart is so full right now! We can ride above the storm safely in Jesus' arms or we can drown! These verses were kinda going through my head:
28) Hast thou not known? hast thou not heard, that the everlasting GOD, the LORD, the CREATOR of the ends of the earth, fainteth not, neither is weary? There is no searching of his understanding.
29) He giveth POWER to the faint; and to them that have no might, He increaseth STRENGTH.
30) Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall:
31) But they that WAIT upon the Lord shall renew their STRENGTH; they shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not be weary, and they shall walk and not faint.
Eagles fly above the storm! Well wow..I guess I better go to bed.. I just had a heart load and had to write it out..
Sunday, January 24, 2010
usually think about how "Hmm who is that..is he single?" Old habits die hard and my mind began to wonder. Then I remembered how whenever I left a church service with this mindset, I was always disappointed and sometimes I would cry. So I turned my thoughts to Jesus and asked him to set my eyes on Him. He gave me these words:
I will not leave you disappointed;
Your my Love, your my Bride, my Chosen
Guess what? I didn't leave disappointed...Jesus filled my heart =D
Thursday, January 21, 2010
So I have been seeking the Lord about Mount Zion International School of Ministry. I finally got the greeen light a couple of weeks ago. Ok so there is this one problem that I knew it was going to take God to work it out. All week long I've been telling myself if it is God's will he will open the way. That nothing is impossible with him! He had given me this verse a couple of months back. "I will go before thee, and make the crooked places straight: I will break in pieces the gates of brass, and cut in sunder the bars of iron:" (Isaiah 45:2) I have been keeping that verse in my heart all week. Monday, me and parents discussed about this certain situation. Well yesterday, my daddy saw this certain person and asked him about it. And the answer was yes! Alright, yesterday afternoon, my friend Shanna calls me and asks me if I wanted some of her skirts. She was cleaning out her closet. Of course I said yes!! So she brought them over. Well I was going through them and there was 2 black skirts. Part of the Mt. Zion dress code is that the girls wear black/burgandy skirts pass the knee. Shanna didn't know that though (I didn't tell her either). But I was just like all happy "Where God GUIDES, He PROVIDES!! Ok well then a third thing happened last night before I went to bed. I decided to open Bro. David Wilkerson's newsletter. He is the founder of Mt. Zion. There was a another piece of paper along with his message. It was announcing that Mt. Zion was taking applications. Let me tell you I felt crazy good!!! I am just so excited!!!!!!!! I am going to Lord Willing have the whole application sent in by March!!! I am so excited I just can't hide it!!!! =D
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
The other day I had this beautiful thought.
Friday, January 15, 2010
(up above-Me and Kristy)
Tonight I am going to go stay with my Bestest Friend Kristy and her husband Jerred. We haven't hung out in awhile so it'll be FUN!! We always have a crazy time!!! It's funny how me and Kristy are so far apart in age (7 years) but we are so much alike. Sometimes we will say the same thing at the same time without anything planned. We call it our brain wave. One night when our young people were out at McDonald's me and Kristy had this brillant idea to get rings with "Brain" and "Wave" on it. Somebody made a remark we should put "No" and "Brain" We are use to their teasing though!! But it's like God has connected us in such a special sister way. We know that one day we are going to do a work for God together. Jerred, her husband, is the most countriest guy you will find and He loves her so much! They knew each other for years and years and graduated high school together but they were just friends. Then in 2008 they met up again and fell in love!! It's so sweet! Last year in September they got married. I was the maid of honour and did a horrible job of it. First, I had Jerred's ring on my thumb and when I went to fix Kristy's veil and it slipped off by the pastor's feet. Then when I reached down to pick it up my shawl was pinned to my dress and one side popped off. So here I was with my bouquet, Kristy's bouquet, Jerred's ring, and trying to keep one side of my shawl from falling. But I survived and nobody noticed!! But it was sad I thought I was losing my best friend forever. But I didn't we are actually closer now and we hang more than what we use to! Anyways I am kinda rambling! Oh another thing is that people have mistaken us for each other multiple times and we aren't even related. Her own father and grandfather mistook me for her!! It's so weird!
But Jesus is my bestest, bestest, bestest friend! He always will be! The other night it was cool. I was thinking about God and this girl had said He was lovely. I began to think of Him and the way he paints the sunset. I actually smiled!!! You know how when you think of that guy when you like him. But the joy wasn't temporary and that smile I really meant it. It's just amazing how God will become our Love if we just open our heart to Him!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Today momma went to her first cat scan since she started Chemo. I don't care what that cat scan said!! I know God healed my momma's body! God comforted me this morning while I was sitting in Adv. Algebra ( I tend to not really pay attention, usually my mind is kinda somewhere else but there at the same time) Anyways. The devil starting warring my mind. I started quoting that scripture "Faith is the Substance of things hoped for, the EVIDENCE of things NOT seen" So I was thinking to myself "Amen!!" Then the next verse kinda hit me in away that I haven't fully realized.."For by it the Elders OBTAINED a GOOD report" I was like "OMW!!!" When I talked to mom this afternoon she had told me about the results. I told her that verse and she told me hers "calleth those things as such they where" ( I think that's how it goes) I don't care what that little machine said...that devil is a liar and GOD is the TRUTH!!
Tonight I got a phone call from a concerned family/church member. She was asking me about how Mom's thing went and I told her we were trusting in God. I didn't want to tell her without permission because people love a good story and they love to add their own things to it. So she was like I am here for you and then the next thing kinda suprised me. She was like "I know you Tiffany, I know you. You are like a hardball, it's ok to cry, you don't need to hold it all in." I was like "God is my comfort" and she said " I know but you don't need to hold it all in" After we hung up I had to laugh..yes laugh. I know she was just trying to help me and be there for me. I can't stand for people to say they know me, when they really don't. During this whole time since September '09 when we found out about Mom's daignosis God has been such a joy and comfort. I have never felt so much peace and joy in my entire life. At the beginning I did break down once. But that day
I gave my total trust to God. I don't need to weep and cry! I need to shout and dance! It's funny that me and mom have to comfort other people who cry about what a thing has happened to her and we are like "Its ok!" But God has just surrounded us with joy unspeakable and we have went on like nothing has ever happened. I guess people ( sad when it's church people too) expect you to sit in the dumps and be worried and tossed about. Anyways I just had to write my heart out a little! It reminds me of that verse in Isaiah 61:3- "the oil of joy for mourning" oh Hallelujah =D
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Sunday, January 10, 2010
The Lord gave me this great idea the other night after I wrote Jency ( the child we sponsor through Compassion) I had some pretty paper and I had a heart cutter and photo paper. I decided I would make her some pretty bookmarks. Well then I made me a matching one to remind me to pray for her. Then I began to think about making them and selling them and then give the money to either Compassion or The Voice of the Martyrs Family fund or something like that. I am praying for God to show me which one. I feel a tug towards the one that helps woman and young girls from abusive pasts to get back on track. I forgot what it was called..ugh!! I'll have to look It up tomorrow. My room is unavaliable at the moment. My oldest brother is staying the night since he sold his house so he slept in my bed tonight. He might be buying our house then we would buy my grandma's house down the road. Anyways I kinda got off topic. But the Lord laid a name in my heart for the
bookmarks "Jency's Hearts" I will just have to see how the Lord leads me! He has been so gentle and so sweet this weekend! How He Loves =D
Friday, January 8, 2010
Omw! I am so excited! Tonight I was writing Jency a letter and I was telling her that God was our strength and buckler. I got to thinking what is a buckler? I've read verses in Psalms about God being our buckler but I didn't really know what it meant. So I
decieded to look it up. This is what buckler means: "armor carried on the arm to intercept blows" I was like wow! So later on after I finished the letter I began to think about it and I was like I gotta look up a verse with buckler in it so I can get the full effect. I was flipping through Psalms and I felt to go to Psalm 18. So I'm turning back and my eyes land on this section of chapter 18 and it was just amazing!! I was like WOW!
Psalm 18:29- For by thee I have run through a troop; and by my God have I leaped over a wall. 30) As for God, his way is perfect: the word of the Lord is tried: he is a BUCKLER to all those that TRUST IN HIM. 31) For who is
our God save the Lord? Or who is our rock save our God? 32) It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect.
It was just what I needed! I had been wanting the troop and leaping over a wall verse and bam there it is. God works in a way you lest expect it!! That's what makes him so awesome! His thoughts are higher than our thoughts and his ways are higher than our ways! I praise Him for that!! In the heat of the battle God is our Buckler taking those blows for us and we are safe under his protection. But we got to put on the whole armor of God! We just can't be lazy but we got to be steadfast and have our heart open to the Lord and to study to show ourselves approved unto God! It also says in 1 Timothy for us to endure hardness as a good soldier in Jesus Christ. No it's not easy way. Paul said is we suffer with him we will reign with him. He also says in Philipians 3:10-" That I may know Him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death." Somewhere in the Bible it says that Jesus learned obdience
through the things that he suffered. Ok wow, I kinda got off subject in away well maybe not. God is FULLY AWESOME!!!!
Friday, January 1, 2010
My dad and little brother is watching football. Its between Cincinnati and Florida Gators. I was suprised to see that Tim Teebo (maybe that's how you spell it) had a scripture on his face makeup. It was Ephesians 2:8-10. You just don't say that every day.
We made it to Canada safely. We had to turn our cell phones off it costs money to have them on. But I still have my laptop and there is wireless internet at the motel we are staying at. Daddy preached a good word tonight at the church. It was about setting our affections on things above. I also learned a new Ojibwa word. "Shook-may-gay-wen" It means promise. The people up here are so sweet. The pastor Sis. Sarah Waboose is in her sixties and she has such a servant's heart. She prepares some really good meals too. God has really been working on my heart about sacrifice. I am slowly beginning to understand about being a servant. It's just amazing and humbling. I know it's only by the grace of God.
"He is jealous for me. Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy! And all of the sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclisped by glory, and I realize just how beautiful you are, and how great your affections are for me!"
(Oh How He Loves Us; David Crowder)
To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.